caring is cool.

fashion, you sexy, fickle, hurtful bitch. 

on one hand, gorgeous amazeballs holy moly yes.

on the other hand, if a dude was trying to attack you, you’d be pretty much s.o.l. in these Rape Makers. 

(via shamelesshipsterscum)

Those shoes are a little Frankenstein’s Monster-meets-orthopedic-shoes-to-correct-legs-of-different-lengths, and obvs I am way too cheap to spend the money on an LV satchel because imagine how much other stuff I could buy at H&M/Forevs/my outlets, BUT STILL.

The satchel plus colored furry tail things is kind of amazing.

evachen212:

a closer look @stormihenley’s accessories: vintage Vuitton bag with furry tails!

GIMME. Oops, which sin was that?

(Source: themissive, via fucknicethings)

i guess this isn’t super surprising, but it’s interesting to have it spelled out like that for us. 

have any of you guys seen Century of the Self? it’s a BBC documentary that almost literally was too mind-blowing for me to handle. if you’re interested in the coercive nature of advertising, it’s going to basically change your life. it’s hard to find, but not impossible and HIGHLY worth the search.

i tried to buy this today and it wouldn’t let me. my sadness was both profound and fleeting. 

this outfit has kind of a nora dunn/jan hooks era SNL vibe to it. like they’d wear this to play neurotic wives out on a hilariously disastrous date with a zany character played by guest star bruce willis, of hit show “moonlighting.”

it is important that i never see another “stylish” woman with a ridiculous hairmuffin bun on top of her head. magazines, you need to stop telling ladies that it looks chic because it looks something-that-is-not-chic.

i will accept this confusingly be-ponchoed lass’s apology in the form of her fancy shoes.

my favorite thing about high fashion is how accessible it is to average women. this outfit is perfect for those days you want to feel like a lizard alien dominatrix from germany. nailed it.

hahahaha there is not a single element of this outfit that i admire individually, and together they are a perfect storm of WTF. that shirt is very free trade from Whole Foods! those pants are very Chico’s summertime wash and wear linen line! those shoes are very Frankenstein schoolgirl! that bag is very sassy old lady who brings her medications with her everywhere! 

GUILTY.

9000v0006:

archer blues (by 9 0 0 0)

very important scientific research at work here. totally official.

“very science. very research.” - gabe delayahe

(p.s. i’m a european showerer - i.e. filthy - and i am gratified that “science” is continuing to back up what i intuitively knew already. stop bathing all the time, weirdos. stop washing your hair so much. just let your body be the way it’s supposed to be. all your washing and shampooing makes you need more washing and shampooing. you’re just doing what The Man wants you to do, to buy more products. OPEN YOUR EYES, SHEEPLE.)

after a couple of years of search, i finally bought the military jacket of my dreams. LOVE. I like how she layered it over such a sweet dress. also love her bizarre booties with the orange socks. i would never, ever wear those shoes, but i am picking up what she’s laying down there.

bonjour, madame! je voudrais avoir votre boots, s’il vous plait! merci! 

also, i like how boring a lot of the outfit is and then the zing of her orangey lipstick. i doubt i’d wear orange-red lips, but i am impressed by hers.

yikes. no thanks. she looks like a young mormon, with some orthopedic problems.

i don’t know why everyone says that fashion sets unrealistic standards for beauty. what a healthy looking mummified skeleton lady!

i’m sure she’s a model who’s had her hair and makeup done for a show but yiiiiikes.

she looks like an old barbie.

hahahahahaha

what? 

warning: what follows is a long narrative of my thoughts related to something very few people care about, or can relate to. enjoy!

i’ve been searching the interwebs for The Perfect iPad Case. i’m the sort of person who puts their devices in a case and never takes them out, so the case IS the device for me. i haven’t seen my iPad, iPaddy, naked since i took it out of it’s cabbage leaf, and iPhy III, my iPhone, has probably only been naked a total of an hour in her life. i just pop them in and don’t ever remove them, aside from periodic case washings.

when S bought me my iPad for my birthday (best present ever, doodz), i got the Apple brand one, since it was the cheapest and i wasn’t totally sure what i’d be needing out of my case. there are some things i continue enjoy about the Apple one.

1) i like how slim it is. it doesn’t add any weight or bulk.

2) it’s not fancy so i’m not worried about it getting dirty or anything.

3) it fits snugly and feels surprisingly protective, for how thin it is.

4) all ports are exposed, which i guess is a common problem with 2nd party (3rd party? i have no idea what the terminology is.) accessories. i wouldn’t have guessed that something that obvious would be something often overlooked in accessory design, but okay. 

my major complaints for the Apple case are:

1) how filthy the case gets and

2) how impossible it is to clean. it’s made of some kind of microfiber stuff that is like ick-velcro. it’s now covered in dirty fingerprints and various mystery stains, which kind of clashes with the “futuristic super vixen” image i am trying to perpetuate. it’s more like “futuristic super vixen with surprisingly scummy hands.”

3) i also use my iPad a lot like i used to use my filofax, so i’d love some paper and maybe even a pocket for storing bills and receipts and stuff.

so, in an effort to find The Perfect iPad Cover, i have spent literally HOURS pouring over sites, looking at pictures, reading reviews, checking various weights and such. overall, most of them seem to suck. (i know. we can file this under Problems That Aren’t Really Problems.)

i got pretty excited about the DODOcase. check out this sexy bitch of a case. 

GORGEOUS. and it looks like a Moleskine! 

(gonna digress for one weensy sec to say that Moleskine notebooks are a major weakness of mine. as we speak i have the tab open to buy my yearly calendar from them, as well as a recipe notebook. they will go nicely with my notebook, my mini-writing pad, my yearly calendar from last year and my NY city guide. i can’t stop buying them.)

but one of my concerns about the DODOcase is the extra weight the bamboo frame adds, and the fact that they stress that the bamboo will totally break if you drop it wrong. i don’t need it to be made of titanium, but if it can’t protect iPaddy from a wee fall, that kind of defeats one of the main purposes of buying a case at all. also it’s pretty expensive. it hasn’t got any additional pockets AND it only kind of works for propping the iPad up at an angle. so, not 100% sold. i got my grubby goonhands on a friend’s, and i admit it remains as sexy as i imagined. but pretty heavy, with none of the elements i’m looking for.

then THIS Moleskine brand iPad cover happens. this gorgeous collision of my passions. this miraculous explosion of perfect synergy. this mad lovely goulash of my most heartfelt dreams. it’s like they looked into my soul, saw what my heart was crying out for so passionately, and then gave it to me.

LITERALLY cannot overstate my excitement.  

(one might say this feeling unapproachable, if one were inclined to say things like that… my gummies know what i’m talking about.)

important p.s. we only have that one picture by which to judge the quality of the product. i can see it having similar problems to the DODOcase, with regards to extra weight and maybe not being good for propping at an angle. there will be plenty of time for reality to destroy this perfect golden moment of anticipation for me. right now, i am imagining that it is EVERYTHING i want. please don’t take that from me.