caring is cool.

srsly. get your shit together, weirdos. 

(i mean, yay, do your own thing. but also what the hell are you doing? seriously?)

(Source: iraffiruse)

Hahaha, PILATES! Nice form, Ma’am!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

omg man, O.M.G.

hahahahahahahaha oh man.

Is this what it’s going to be like to have kids? Because this is the BEST!

letmeworryaboutblank:

versustheworld:

fueledbypureawesome:

The 90s were fun. Buuuuuuut I lived through them. And as much as I wish grunge would come back and all my ratty flannel shirts and my boots would be in style again, I wouldn’t want to do it again. 

Then again, if that post had anything to do with the 80s, I would be all over it.

I don’t think there’s ever been an “era” where kids cared more about music than popularity or sex. 

(Source: holding-0n-to-a-fairytale)

answer: yes, of course. prior to the invention of the internet there were approximately zero sex crimes, ever.

wow, that was a poorly thought out comparison, mrs. bachmann. 

jamesurbaniak:

Fasten your seatbelts, it’s going to be a bumpy ride.

okay, first up, The Dilemma by ron howard.

i enjoy sentimentality, so obvious ron howard it often exactly what my schmaltzy little heart desires. oh, did i mention that it stars vince vaughn and kevin james?

YIIIIKES. 

warning signs. red lights flashing.

 

i have enjoyed vince vaughn many times, but i’m tired of him. also, i watched that show with jon favreau, where he eats dinner and talks with some friends, and vince vaughn was easily the most annoying person ever on it. not encouraged by his particiption. kevin james? i dunno. didn’t see that fat cop movie. begrudgingly admit i found him endearing in hitch. switch? no. i think it’s hitch. with will smith. but his usual movie choices are far from my taste. sooo…hmmm.

what else, you ask? oh, it also stars jennifer connelly, winona ryder, channing tatum and queen latifah. i’m having a lot of mixed signals happening.

if jennifer connelly is in it, isn’t it either scary or depressing?

i will seriously go to ridiculous lengths to avoid winona ryder’s face, and her surprising me in this trailer was fucking uncool.

i have vaguely positive feelings about queen latifah, but her using the term “lady wood” in the trailer possibly snuffed those out.

i have no feelings about channing tatum. he dances, right? i don’t know. his eyes are sort of slitty for me. jocks who dance are pretty cool. i read an interview with him that was pretty cute. i don’t know. neutral.

the trailer, you guys. NO BUENO. a) having trouble getting over winona ryder being in this movie. why is she acting again? please get her out of movies again. is she sober or something now? hide some pills in her purse for her to find because i need her to go back to wherever she was before.  b) the dilemma is whether or not you should tell your best friend that his wife is cheating on him? what is the fucking dilemma? yes. you should. if you don’t you’re a piece of shit. short movie! problem solved! c) was that a maroon 5 song in the preview? yeah, no dilemma. 

sorry, ron howard. where you’re going, i cannot follow you.

okay, next we have Legacy.

 

it’s important to say right up front that i will definitely not see this movie. no matter how exciting the cast is, and it is very exciting if you watch HBO shows. there is zero way i will watch this entire movie. i might, however, watch some loops of idris elba working out, if such a thing becomes available. 

but should YOU see this movie? well, i dunno, do you like The Wire? because stringer bell AND lester freamon are in this! what about Oz? did you like that show? because the guy who played sayeed is in this! how do you feel about Doctor Who? because the lady who played the farting pig-looking alien in season one is in this trailer as a neighbor! LOTS TO SEE!

do you like movies about battle scarred super warriors who hide in their dingy apartments while they plot some sort of revenge? do you like caring ladies who want to break through that hardened exterior to the soft pulsing heart beneath? do you like violence done with knives? wow, you have a lot to look forward to, then.

me, not so much. if there aren’t dragons, a heartwarming ending or drew barrymore, i’m probably not gonna see it. but you enjoy it!

PEACE OUT 

next up, Jack Goes Boating.

The Rowing Curmudgeon 

this is phillip seymour hoffman’s directorial debut. or is it? i don’t know. this isn’t wikipedia, do some work for yourself. he definitely directs it, though. it stars him, amy ryan, and two other people who look familiar but i’m not gonna check from where. 

it looks like Punch Drunk Love to me, in which psh also starred. i enjoyed PDL, but not enough to see it again, probably. 

(i know a lot of people are going to scoff about this, because it’s about damaged white people, and apparently now it’s cool to feel like anyone who isn’t literally starving to death in darfur is a whiny baby and isn’t allowed to experience suffering ever. those people who think that should be quiet.) 

summarized, psh is damaged and weird. (really? fake dreads? okay. whatever.) he gets set up on a date with amy ryan, who is weird and lovely and strangely likes dudes with asperger’s, and they fall in love. there is some side story about the other couple, about how tough marriage is. (TESTIFY! - j/k, honey!) and psh can’t swim but he learns so he can take her boating. (why not just wear a life preserver, which you should do anyway when you’re boating because that’s just safer? also, this pond doesn’t seem that deep, so i feel like a life preserver for both of you would totally suffice. it’s not like you’re rowing across the north sea or something, guy.) still. he conquers his water fears to be able to row her around in a pond, which i guess is a big deal for this weirdo.

facin’ my fearz, dooodz!

also, the trailer ends with some soaring fleet foxes, which may or may not have made me choke up.

i will not see this movie, either, because of my aforementioned rules, but i bet it’ll probably be at least decent. i like amy ryan a lot.

next we have Like Dandelion Dust. nope. sorry, barry pepper. maybe next time. (or maybe not.)

alright, that’s it for now. please remember that this is far from all the trailers out now. i skip the ones that look dumb or uninteresting or too foreign for me. 

please feel free to post your own trailer reviews, or any additional thoughts you might have about these trailers, okay?

about the role of emotion in decision-making, specifically voting. the author says that if the democrats want to win, they need to tug the heartstrings and engage emotions, instead of pretending people use their logical brains to vote with. 

sounds really interesting, right?

if you read it, tell me how it is! i’m sort of backed up with books about dragons and/or vampires, and i just won’t have the time, probably.

while i support a woman’s right to dress revealingly, compete in wet t-shirt contests, and share drunken girl-on-girl kisses for the viewing pleasure of strangers, should that be how she chooses to express her sexuality, i also support my own right to laugh at jokes about those ladies’ choices because they are very funny choices!

(ugh, i think the formatting on my new tumblr theme won’t show this full sized, which is a bunch of bollocks, but if you’re that interested in it, i’m sure you can figure out how to see it the way god intended.)

chriskelly:

This video is back on the main page of The Onion this week. I don’t know why it is, but it’s one of my favorite things I’ve written for ONN, so I’ll take it!

If you haven’t seen it yet, would you like to take a look? It’s about Justin Bieber. No it’s not. But watch it anyway.

some friends and i were discussing british slang that is different from slang we’re used to. this made me think of chavs and how i wasn’t that clear on what they are, so i wiki’d it, because of course i did.

it makes me think of the prevalence of the term ‘white trash’ these days. the british obsession with distancing itself from ‘chavs’ is comparable to our obsession with white trash, people of walmart, jersey shore and all that. just class discomfort. we wouldn’t feel the need to stare open-mouthed at people who are poor and/or stupid if we weren’t a little defensive of our own positions, right? people seem to really hate the chavs, though! did you read the section where the burberry spokeslady disses them like a champion? god forbid her company’s clothing line be popular with poor people! speaking of, i saw a homeless guy in santa monica sleeping underneath a filthy burberry trench. capitalism!

here’s a bit more about chavs, by someone who hates them. http://chavspeak.info/

profound thought of the day: things are different in other places. but also the same! my anthropology professors would be so proud.

i can’t believe that this is even a thing we need to make a sign about.